Saturday, 4 June 2011


It's about time I wrote something really.

It's been two weeks now. Over a third of the way through and I'm coasting really. People keep asking me when it starts, then looking shocked and telling me I don't smell. Please allow me to clarify: I do smell. It's just much easier to smell me when I'm naked.

This is not an invitation, just a fact.

Wearing clean clothes every day is making a huge difference. Apparently some people do this all the time, which strikes me as a huge waste of water, electricity and effort, but there's no accounting for taste I suppose. I have just put the washing machine on for the fourth time since this started. That's twice a week for the clothes of two people, which is practically criminal as far as I'm concerned.

I think it's actually my mouth which is the most upsetting part of me as far as cleanliness goes. Not really on a day-to-day basis, but it was a friend's birthday yesterday and I was drinking til the wee small hours last night. Now my mouth feels and tastes a bit like an ashtray that an alcoholic tramp has pissed in and I would dearly love to do something about it but sheer bloody-mindedness is stopping me. It's OK though, this feeling will pass. It might just take a couple of hours to, and those couple of hours will be a little unpleasant, but it will pass.

OK, live update. I am sitting here naked (you may remember I mentioned this in an earlier post) and have just managed to sneeze all over myself. I couldn't get my hand in front of my face in time. Please refer to what I have just been saying about the state of my mouth and take a little time to imagine exactly how I feel about this turn of events. I am sitting less than three metres from a bathtub. This is torture.

I will persevere. I WILL persevere.

Bye now.

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